Pride's Purge

(satire)

Tesco has been voted the UK’s worst riding school and pony club in an annual poll of 11,000 consumers by watchdog Which?

Tesco was at the bottom of the table, scoring just 45% for the quality of its horses – most of which were found to be dead – and receiving poor marks for its lack of riding facilities in the fresh meat section and trained riding instructors manning its check-outs.

One dissatisfied Tesco customer said:

The overall riding experience at Tesco was rubbish – mainly because although there were plenty of horses available, all of them had been killed and cut up into mince meat.

Not only that, but the children’s pony club consisted of just a few packets of Monty’s Favourite Meat Balls in Alphabetti Spaghetti and a couple of Little Dish Laughing Lasagnes.

More than 11,000 Which? members rated supermarkets for the quality of their equestrian…

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